Typing One Handed

Parenting is a game where only the kids know the rules.

My Life as a TV Show December 12, 2009

Filed under: friends,Mom Tricks — Kelly Jo @ 12:49 am
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Have you ever thought about what your life would look like if it were to be played out as a TV show?  I think about that sometimes.  This shouldn’t surprise you, I think we have pretty well established by now that my mind moves in the most random directions imaginable.

Anyhow, I was thinking about this again tonight while we had a small group of close friends over.  I have a lot of people who I love getting together with, but I must say that this particular group of friends, especially when all of us are together, provide me with the most laughs I can produce in a few hours time.  All topics are covered-from the obvious (the name of my blog), to the not so obvious (how to properly swaddle a grown man).

This man is about to become a father for the first time.

After our friends had left I began thinking about my life as a TV show while I was cleaning up.  Mom trick: always clean up immediately after any type of party or gathering, and then stay up as late as possible to enjoy your clean house while you can. There are four different types of comedies I can think of.  You have your dramedy (like Desperate Housewives), awkward silences (The Office), laugh track (Friends) and the live studio audience (The Cosby Show).

My life (and probably everyone else’s) goes through all these type of comedies.  I have a little dramedy thrown my way at times, I have way more awkward silences than I would care to admit (last night’s blog, for example), and perhaps a bit of the forced laughs, but overall, there is a lot of real laughter in my life.

I love the nights like tonight.  I love when by the end of the night my cheeks hurt from smiling so much and my stomach muscles hurt from laughing so hard.  I love for my daughters to see their parents having fun, and the importance of having good friends in your life.

Mostly, I love that we are each other’s own live studio audience- no laugh track needed.  My life as a TV show would not be interesting without these characters.  My life as a whole would be missing a lot of laughter.

I hope that during this Christmas season you will have a chance to be with your friends who mean so much to you.  I hope you won’t overlook how wonderful it is when they are comfortable enough to curl up on your couch, to sit down and stretch on your kitchen floor, or to help themselves to the contents your cupboards, knowing full well that they don’t have to ask anymore.  Bonus points if they make fun of the contents of your cupboards, or lack thereof, as the case may be.

Most of all, I hope you will have a chance to laugh until it hurts.  Especially if you are in deep need of that good laugh.  Thank you to my friends for giving me that gift today.  What a wonderful Christmas present.


The Queen of Snacking Trickery December 7, 2009

Filed under: kids,Mom Tricks — Kelly Jo @ 11:15 pm

I have learned something very important over the last few weeks: the holiday season is not a good time to try to lose baby weight.

In hindsight, the timing of my recent pregnancy wasn’t the best.  I started my third trimester in July- bonus points for being Portland’s hottest summer EVER.  We broke records here, people.  I couldn’t have a cocktail to celebrate Kelly’s and my 5th anniversary or my sister’s 30th birthday, and of course, the aforementioned timing of trying to drop the pounds.

I worked very hard during my pregnancy to gain a proper amount of weight, and that hard work paid off, I was successful in that arena.  However, that doesn’t create a cakewalk when it comes to losing that weight (mmm… cake).  I lost all the obvious weight (you know- baby, placenta, amniotic fluid- all that gross stuff) but that last bit is stubbornly hanging around.  You know, the bit that makes the difference between if you can wear a form-fitting shirt with your favorite jeans, or if you’re stuck in your PMS jeans with a giant sweatshirt.  Unfortunately for me, my giant sweatshirt is a Washington State University sweatshirt.  I don’t know if all the snickering I hear behind my back is because I need to drop a few, or because I’m publicly supporting the Cougars.  But I digress.

With all of this delicious food coming into my house since early October, I haven’t felt like I’ve set the best nutritional example for my two-year old.  I don’t want her to think that peanut brittle and Chex Mix is a complete meal, so I thought up a wonderful little trick.

We have homemade Chex Mix around for pretty much all of December.  It’s one of my favorite holiday treats, and I swear I save calories all year for  this.  I also lie a lot.  After making the first batch, Zoey started noticing that we suddenly have a delicious snack around.  I don’t want to share let my two-year old have that much sodium, so I concocted a special mixture.  It is all the ingredients that go in the mix (multi grain Chex cereal, mixed nuts, and a few pretzels-not too bad for a kid’s snack) but I skip cooking them in the butter and salt mixture.   Duh Kelly Jo, that’s obvious.  I know you thought it, but here is where the execution of the plan comes in.

You see, the first time I tried to sneak in the intruder mix, I just had it in a baggie off to the side.  Zoey looked at the impostor snack on her plate, which looks EXACTLY the same, and says “No, that!” as she points to the real stuff.  Shoot, that kid is smarter than I gave her credit for.  So I came up with a new plan.  Same mix, same baggie, but I now store the bag inside the same container as the good stuff.  And because I haven’t lost those last few pounds, I am big enough to block her view while I sneak the healthier version into her snack bowl.

So really, my not losing these last few pounds is all part of a carefully crafted plan to help my two-year old snack healthier.  Of course, if I didn’t make the Chex Mix I wouldn’t have to be so sneaky…

No, it is a carefully crafted plan.